Leaving One Home for Another…

16th March, 2007

Five years… When you idly think about it, it seems to be quite a long time; but when you actively live it, it is actually very, very short… Thus says my personal experience…

Nearly five years ago, when I was a young and vulnerable girl of 18, I’d stepped into this strange, unknown city of Pune for the first time. I didn’t know anyone here, neither did I know anything about the city, or about how I was going to spend the next five years here – utterly alone, defenseless… It was a scary feeling, because I’d always been in a protected environment before this. Of course, I was always independent and self-sufficient. I was always encouraged to live my own life and solve my own problems – but this was different. Here, I would not even have my parents by my side if I needed them…

However, it was my own decision to come here, so I put up a brave front – and decided not to regret my actions! The one thing that kept me going in those days was the fact that I’d at least proved myself to my family, by getting into this prestigious institution all by myself… I’d earned their respect, and I did not want to lose it. So, when my parents finally bade me goodbye and left for home, leaving me all alone here, I did not cry, I did not allow myself to lose heart… I told myself, “it’s only a matter of a few months, and then I’ll be able to go home again, in the holidays!”

I need not have worried, though… the beauty of the city captured me the very first day, with all its hills and greenery and natural assets, and slowly but surely, Pune started becoming my second home… I made new friends – some good ones, some not so good ones – but they were enough to keep me going. In fact, for the first time in my life I learnt to appreciate solitude, and the joys of being in my own company!

Slowly, time brought me closer to the city… I loved its natural beauty, I loved its environment, and I loved my newfound maturity…

Not all my experiences here were good though… I, for example, seemed to have a weird knack of attracting the strangest and most irksome lot of people, both as roommates and as acquaintances! But I managed to pull through… through those bitter-sweet encounters, I learnt a lot, and at the same time got to figure out the realities of life!

Not that I did not make any good friends… I did, but they are handful in number. Because life here in Pune has made me realize that “friendship” is a rare thing to happen! Life here in Pune has made me appreciate the only true friends I have – Moumita, Ranjinee, Parama, Shiropa, Saurya… And thanks to the tough life I led here in Pune, today I know that no matter what, only those friendships survive the test of life whose foundation lies in unconditional love and trust…

Pune has taught me to fight for my own space… to be strong mentally, physically and emotionally… to expect nothing from the world… to suspect an ulterior motive behind every friendly gesture…! You might think I’m being too negative, but it’s not so! Had I not come to this city, and had I not stayed here in the midst of all these odds, I would actually have never learnt these very important lessons of life. I take all of it in a positive light – life in Pune has made me worldly wise. Today, the mature head that rests on my firm shoulders is a result of this very journey, which lasted five years and was so full of hardships!

And yet, in spite of all these hardships, it still aches to leave the city. Standing at the fag end of my student-life in this ever-young city, I find myself yearning to stay on for a few more days… I find myself longing to relive the experiences of these five years just one more time… Perhaps to rectify certain mistakes of mine in some situations, perhaps to savor certain times and incidents all over, perhaps to be a kid once again…

You might again be wondering, “If she has such bitter experiences, then what on earth wants to make her stay on?” The answer is, no, I’ve not only had bitter experiences here… in fact, certain sweet memories are hidden even in the apparently bitter ones! It is here that I’ve come across people I’d never want to forget, and it is here that I’ve spent times that I’d never be able to replicate!

It is difficult for me to express what exactly I feel for this place… For five years now, this city has been my existence. It has been a second home to me. It gives me such immense joy just to be in the city… It has given me so much wisdom, love, courage and strength that now I’m prepared to face life like never before. It means so much to me…

Now that the time to leave Pune is steadily drawing near, mixed emotions overcome me… Some moments make me feel helpless, some make me sad, yet others make me expectant – until I slowly lose myself in the entire gamut of emotions…

Leaving Pune makes me feel as if I’ve shredded out a piece of my heart… a tiny little piece of my heart, that will always stay here – in this beautiful, bitter-sweet city of Pune!